So, I've been in contact with this dude from Oklahoma City who had a reel to reel tape machine for sale. It looked pretty old, but still worked fine, had four inputs, and it was only fifty dollars. My girlfriend, being the awesome bitch that she is, wanted to get me a Christmas gift, and since everything else that I want isn't exactly a reasonable price, she decided to get the reel to reel. Sweet! One problem... Old boy with the tape machine sold it out from under me, that dirty bastard. So as a replacement gift she was going to buy me this old snare drum from a local antique store. Sweet! x2! Not sweet x2. Someone beat us to the punch. It seemed Christmas would be yet another let down. What the fuck?
BUT WAIT A FUCKIN' TICK! Amy's so awesome, she was all "Hey bro, let's just go to the city and I'll buy you some records (because the places to get records in Stillwater suck/= antique stores). And I was all "FUCK YEAH!" So, we went to the great city of Oklahoma... City... and hit up the mall for some friend gifts and Sabarro for some pizza. BTW, I'm not sure if you guys know about this, but there's a store called Forever 21. What the fuck is that place about? Goddamn, I've never felt like more of an idiot for walking into a place. Wall to wall full of dumbshit clothes with the most annoying dance pop playing loud as shit over the speakers. I dunno, I think this place is supposed to be hip or something. What the fuck?
Anyhoo, after the fuckin' mall, we fuckin' went to fuckin' Vintage Stock. HOLY SHIT. I had never been to a Vintage Stock before and nearly shat myself upon entering. My god, they have pretty much every nerdy thing I could ever want. Ever. Long story short we left with about $25 worth of VHS tapes (which comes out to about 18 tapes, including "Encino Man", signed by both Pauly Shore and Brendan Fraser), a copy of Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2 for N64, a Mario Paint mouse for SNES, and a giant Ghostbusters poster. What the fuck?
We finally made our way to Guestroom where Amy bought me "Melted" by Ty Segall and I bought a few cassette tapes and some pins/buttons. Alright, here's the last "What the fuck?" moment. Back in "the day", when I was listening to more 80s hardcore than any kid not from the 80s should listen to, there was this band that I remember called Murphy's Law. I know I had at least one compilation with them on it, but don't really remember hearing them. I saw one of their tapes for two bucks and decided to buy it. Fuckin' dumb. I was an idiot and didn't look at the date on the back. 1991. This is a rule that is true for pretty much any hardcore band. If they were cool for like two years in the early 80s, they were probably shitty as shit in the early 90s. One of the dumbest albums I think I've heard. It's called "The Best of Times". It wasn't. It was actually the worst of times. It sounds like 80s Red Hot Chili Peppers, but shittier. Not only did I not see the date on the back, but I totally skipped all of the track titles. "Big Spliff", "Freaktown", "Santa's Got a Brand New Bag", "Hemp for Victory". Ya know, all the hits. I mean, fuck, man. What the fuckity fuck fuck fuck-a-roo? Were they kidding?! Bunch of fuckin' douche bags. Shit.
STUPID^^
Ok, it's time to make a smoothie. Later.
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